Britain doesn't need Labour's first woman Chancellor - we need Labour's first good Chancellor, says Mark Dolan

This is a grim reaper of a Government that said it wouldn't need to borrow more money, but it has borrowed more money. It said that it wouldn't raise any more taxes, but guess what? It raised more taxes.

It said it will be the Government of economic growth, except the Office for Budget Responsibility, who had to go through the Budget in detail scarier than anything by horror writer Stephen King, predict that this Budget will lower economic growth. This Government, a Frankenstein monster, said it would pursue policies to get interest rates down.

Well, the aforementioned OBR, who probably now have PTSD, having gone through the books so carefully predict that interest rates will now stay higher for longer. Oh, and more great news - the cost of Government borrowing has gone up.

In fact, so-called ten-year gilt yields are now higher than after Liz Truss's own budget meltdown. Honestly, poor old Liz Truss is like Warren bloody Buffett compared to this shower.

So with Government borrowing up, interest rates up, the national debt up, taxes up and the pound crashing down, has Rachel Reeves crashed the economy? Asking for a friend.

There were so many needless victims in this Halloween budget, which contained plenty of tricks but absolutely no treats, especially family farmers who will struggle to pass on their assets to the next generation, leaving obese health guru and king of the jabs, Bill Gates, to buy up the British countryside. What could possibly go wrong?

Now, Labour got into a pickle about what a working person is before the Budget. Well, it turns out anyone with a job was spooked by this Budget with the influential Institute for Fiscal Studies clear that a hike in National Insurance contributions on employers will largely be shouldered by ordinary working Brits through lower wages, a drop in recruitment and redundancies.

Now, Rachel Reeves has been banging on endlessly about being the first female Chancellor. Is that really such a story? Margaret Thatcher was Prime Minister of the United Kingdom when I was five.

In terms of Rachel Reeves's nauseating identity politics - if I was a woman, never say never - it is 2024 and I've got great legs - I would be embarrassed by this first woman Chancellor.

I don't know how many aspiring women would want to put their names to this particular sister, who has consigned Britain to five years of debt, taxes and anaemic growth. You see, what we need is not Labour's first woman Chancellor, we need Labour's first good Chancellor, and it seems we've got a weight on our hands.

So how long has it taken for the political and economic mirage of socialism to once again be revealed and debunked?

Well, just over 100 days following freebie gate, the Chagos Islands disaster and the Southport far-right slur, many observers thought things couldn't get any worse under this new administration but they were wrong.

This Halloween Budget is only the beginning of Britain's nightmare.